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by
: Dave Gallen
Why is it that you have not found the man of
your dreams? If dating and finding your gay mate seem to be an
impossible dream
don’t worry, help is at hand. Only a few action points are
needed to get you on the track to finding that hot hunk who will
be your partner.
Figure out who you are and what you really want
Make a list of your top ten qualities. Jack Desling, a gay dating
coach, says that several people feel challenged when asked to
list ten things. It is easier to think of what you can offer
physically ( great smile, great body), emotionally ( great listening
skills, stability, a shoulder to lean on), intellectually ( stimulating
conversation, good understanding of music, excellent wit, sharp
mind), financially( stable financial life, ability to balance
accounts), and socially ( great dancing skills, ability to negotiate
with people).
Once you
have a listed all your great qualities, also list what you
would look for
in a guy. It is important to not come up with
a ambiguous list stating ‘Sexy, great body, humorous guy’.
Try to think of more specific things like ‘someone who
smiles a lot, is warm, is interested in sports ( or any other
interest you may have)’. Also list things that are a definite
no, like someone who smokes (if you are allergic to cigarette
smoke).
Take Action
It is important
to convert your thoughts into action. You want to find the
guy
of your dreams, but he won’t turn up at
your door step and say, “ Hi Hunk!” If you really
want to hook up take things in your own hands.
* Join a personals service. They are a good way of taking in
the local scene and finding interesting people.
* Join up at least one Gay club/ organization : Participation
in common activities can lead to friendship and much more.
* Post your profile online : Online dating can open several doors
* Hang out at local haunts populated by other gay singles
Attitude Counts
You will
encounter both fear and failure. You will feel intimidated
when going
for a date. If the fear overwhelms you, keep smiling.
Retain a positive attitude and remind yourself that finding a
mate is no easy job. There will be times when you will hit a
low ebb. You will also end up going on dates or meeting up with
people you don’t like or click with. But persist with your
quest and keep your chin up when you meet with small obstacles.
Increase you chances of a second date
There are simple things that you can do to increase the chances
of converting the first date into a second one :
* Start the conversation. Taking the initiative will work in
your favor.
* Don’t have high expectations : Thinking that the very
first date will unveil the perfect person who will turn you on
physically and emotionally, is unrealistic. Keep your expectations
in check and you won’t be disappointed.
* Look you best. Don’t dress too casually.
* Keep it light. It is important to keep conversation light and
interesting. Do not talk about past relationships, politics,
religion or sex. Keep free of controversy.
* Keep it short. Anything more than a couple of hours will reveal
too much in too little time or indicate desperation.
* Smile, it really does improve your face value
* No sex please. It may be great but won’t get you a second
date.
Jump into the action, use your charms, persist in your quest
and you will find the guy of your dreams. Happy hunting!
Copyright 2005. All rights reserved
Dave Gallen
writes for Gay
Dating.com - If you are Gay and
looking for love then this is the site for you. Articles, Reviews
and Links to the best Gay sites on the Internet.
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